Hand Wash Only

Rituals in the Everyday

Photo by Yves Cedric Schulze on Unsplash

A flashback to last week: 

Checking the temperature of the water as it begins to flow from the tap. 

Citrus washing up liquid and bright yellow Marigold gloves at the ready. 

“Hand Wash Only” read the little round sticker at the base of the new long-stemmed glass I’d received for my birthday earlier that day. I peel the sticker off before immersing it in the suds…

A lot of people of my generation grew up with a dishwasher at home. I didn’t. One of my abiding memories of childhood is standing at the sink in front of the window of our tiny family kitchen, sometimes with the background sound of the neighbours chatting outside just on the other side of the fence, or the local cats getting territorial over space in the back garden. (We didn’t have a cat but I’m sure the cats in the vicinity had some kind of time-share agreement between them over our garden, though that’s a story for another day.) 

Like most kids we had chores. Washing up was one of the chores I liked. It was something everyone in the house did, so it wasn’t a thing I was expected to do because I was a girl, but I found it was something I gravitated towards and enjoyed. From the sound and temperature of the water, to the texture and scent of the washing up liquid, to carefully cleaning and rinsing each item one by one, I found each step of the process calming and soothing. 

It became a ritual for me where I was completely absorbed in the moment.

Now, many years later, I don’t have a dishwasher in my own kitchen. In fact, I’ve never owned one. Standing at the sink, washing items one by one, completely focussed on the task at hand is meditative for me. It allows me to slow down and be present, rather than thinking about whatever comes next.

What I didn’t know as a child and only learned in recent years is that this approach to washing up is mindfulness. Thich Nhat Hanh wrote about this in his book, The Miracle of Mindfulness:

“While washing the dishes one should only be washing the dishes, which means that while washing the dishes one should be completely aware of the fact that one is washing the dishes.” 

From this I understood that it wasn’t really about the washing up or having clean crockery, but more about allowing oneself to approach things mindfully and be present as we go about out days, our lives.

How often do you find that you are ‘doing’ on autopilot, particularly those things you do every day?

As for me, I don’t plan on getting a dishwasher anytime soon. I like my everyday ritual at my kitchen sink. I’ll continue to, “…wash the dishes in order to wash the dishes,” as Thich Nhat Hanh wisely advised. And items that aren’t dishwasher safe will continue to be at home in my kitchen.

Over to you:

So often we feel like we have to add things in order to create space or find peace for ourselves. 

What do you already do each day that could become an everyday ritual for you by approaching it mindfully? It could be something as simple as how you brush your teeth or how you make your tea. Ask yourself:

What can I do mindfully today?

Where can I be more present?